First topic message reminder :

I am hosting a Shabbat seder at our medieval re-enactment in March. It's open to people who are Jewish in real life, people who aren't but who portray medieval Jews, and people who are neither but curious.

I need to find some sort of simple guide that I can print out and take with me on to how to host a seder. A tools list would be helpful (since I have to pack all of this stuff to take with me), but all I really need is the order of the seder and the blessings to say. I'm not worried about keeping it strictly medieval, because it's being presented as a class for people to learn about the Shabbat seder (and pretty much anything else they want to know about Jews, modern or medieval), so I'm open to doing other things during the seder which are optional/not required.

Does anyone have a link to a guide online--maybe your synagogue has a link? Hebrew Christians have plenty of guides, but I'm not going there.

A Rabbi told me that salting the bread is symbolic of the temple sacrifices.

Will there be other Jewish families around to participate and help you along? If not, I wonder if this is the right/time place to do a Shabbat demo? Of course, it's absolutely up to you, but personally I wouldn't feel comfortable 'introducing' people to Shabbat in this situation, where it might be hard to set up a 'Shabbat atmosphere', and when you're still in the process of conversion.

Salt on challah is just traditional, so Conservative Jews being more traditional than Reform Jews are simply more likely to have retained that minhag. Here's one answer about why: A Grain of Salt

Under the circumstances you describe, I think you are right that matzah is your best bet. The matzah does not even have to be from an unopened box; you just need two pieces that are whole. Matzah is always permissible for Hamotzi for Shabbat. In fact, I was once at a friend's house for Shabbat and the guests who had offered to bring challah forgot and left them at home, so the hosts just used matzah.

Two nice whole loaves of bread would be nicer, if they can be bought during the mid-week grocery run. But I'd go with the matzah if the only bread that can be bought that way is loaves of sliced "Wonderbread".

So I guess Dena's question about Havdalah is relevant if this is a multi-day event. However, if you are not actually strictly observing Shabbat by refraining from all forms of work and cooking, then I tend to feel that the Havdalah ritual lacks meaning since you aren't really ending a distinct and different "sacred time" period. However, I understand how other Jews could feel differently about that.

Salting food was what they did at the Temple for sacrifices. The challah is your sacrifice at your Shabbat table.

It doesn't have to be challah - anything made of bread and uncut works (bagels, rolls, pitas).

esf raises some important considerations.

Mychal, have you not completed the conversion process yet? If not, I hope you will not be offended, but it is not proper for someone who is not Jewish to lead prayers or blessings on behalf of other Jews. It is specifically forbidden for someone who is not obligated to do a mitzvah to do it on behalf of others who are obligated. (That the the reason used by many Orthodox poskim, even those who don't think there are issues of "kol isha" [men hearing a women's voice], to rule that women may not lead services such as Shacharit for which they are exempt since women are not required to do "time-bound" mitzvot. For this reason, when the JTS first started to accept women into (Conservative) rabbinical program it required the women to personally pledge to take on the obligation of davening three times a day in order to be counted in a minyan.)

I am sympathetic to people well into the conversion process. I truly understand what it is like: I was a non-Jew who even helped host Passover seders for over 20 years with my Jewish husband before I converted. But I never led any prayer or blessing before I converted, even though I knew them very well. Following along is completely permissible though.

Back to Mychal's situation:
If there are in fact no other Jews at the event, it seems like to do Friday night kiddush as a "demonstration" makes it seem like "cultural anthropology". The Hebrew will be incomprehensible and my feeling is that the rituals will be seen by others as "quaint" in keeping with the other simulated "archaic" activities that you are involved in, rather than part of a serious living tradition observed by modern Jews.

Ps in the story the guest gets upset at the thought of giving the blessing of the cup of wine to a woman, despite that she was a scholar and the daughter of the high priest, that reserved wine blessing was not given to women, just like it is not customary now to offer the wife a drink from the wine during Havdalah. Like I said, I may be mistaken. Also I like to add that the men or maybe the woman too...would do something special on Shabbos or even bring home something, my husband brings fresh flowers for Shabbos. I'm curious on what traditions certain medieval men would do for Shabbos?

When I read what you wrote "medieval re-enactment", a Renaissance fair came to my mind or maybe a play. So you are doing an actual Shabbat as a learning experience? It seems like it will definitely be a learning experience for you and them. Since it is a public thing I would ask a Jewish friend to guide it, as a Noahide our Rabbies have told us from day one not to do public things representing Jews because of the sanctity of Hashems name. We used to have mezuzahs but did not put them up on our new place out of respect. We did not agree at first then listen to the logic behind it. We had parties, barbeques with pork items and drinking and all kinds of hooligan fun things at our previous home. Little did we know our neighbor was Jewish until he whispered to my husband if we were. Now that I know better (and refrain from any pork products, gelatin etc. dairy w/meats) we do not put up mezuzahs so that we are not mistaken as messianic or Jewish people who are not observant. I understand that you have a Jewish soul, and you will do what you think is best regardless of what people tell you. Believe me I understand, we are told not to study beyond the 7 laws of Noah but because we choose to study anyways, we can say we have read and studied 6 Talmud tractates as minimum and can have a discussion to defend our right to study. So my advice is labor in Torah so that you can also be confident in performing such a sacred holiday as Shabbat. Reality is that those in that attend your function will not see it for its true significance but merely a ritual act of a "Day of Rest." Yes they may show respect, but it will not be significant because it takes more than an hour to comprehend the impact on the universe to perform such a empowering act of celebrating Shabbos. I pray Hashem gives you the passion and insight and verbal skills to put it into a context that will shake their very soul and start a spark within them.

Mychal:
I would encourage you to put a call out to Jewish participants (and others who are curious) who would be interested in a Friday night kiddush. Then, try to line up Jewish members to lead various parts. I know you might like to do the leading yourself, but it really isn't proper for a non-Jew to lead on behalf of Jews---I'm pretty sure that even most Reform rabbis would agree (that's why at most Reform shuls, there are still some rules about what non-Jews can do---most will not allow a non-Jew to individually take an Aliyah, for example). And you'll have plenty of chances to lead after you convert. Dena is correct that I am not saying that non-Jews can't perform Jewish rituals---I did that myself for over 20 years---and was way more "Jewishly observant" than any of my Reform and many of my Conservative Jewish friends. I'm not concerned about "validity", but about "propriety"---more like the fact that at my minyan a man taking an aliyah without wearing a tallit while up at the bima would be considered improper. (It is optional for women to wear a tallit while at the bima.)

But organizing rather than leading is permissible. In fact, you could say that I was exactly in that position when, before I converted, I ended up being the coordinator for a full Shabbat morning service of a Shabbaton! It came about because the board member who organized the coordinating duty rotation found out to his consternation that I was not Jewish. This was in part related to my finding out that after a decade of active participation in our beloved lay-led minyan and my family paying full family dues that because I was not Jewish, I could not only not officially be a "member", but there was no category for me to officially affiliate at all. (Even if unofficially and socially I was warmly welcomed.) I honestly thought he knew that I wasn't Jewish since I never tried to hide it, but since I was so active and I knew the services quite well, I guess I could see how he might not have known. Although the board member said he had strong views on requirements of Jewish status for membership, he tried to be gracious by telling me that he didn't feel that my not being Jewish disqualified me from coordinating.

I think he gave me the Shabbaton service because he had actually been planning to organize that Shabbat himself so he could make the switch easily. I ended up lining up seven Torah readers and a Haftarah reader, people to lead P'sukei D'Zimra, Shacharit, and Musaf, and two Gabbaim. Then I was responsible for handing out honors for 7 Aliyot, lifting and wrapping the Torah, etc. When I asked the guest speaker if he was a Cohen or Levi, I remember thinking how shocked he would probably be if he knew that the person asking him was ineligible to take any aliyah at all. It turned out to be an amusingly (in retrospect) challenging day to coordinate with all sorts of complications like no Cohen in the house and the Musaf leader with a bad back who needed someone else to carry the Torah for him.....

Your plans for a Friday night kiddush are more equivalent to an event at the Hillel if it is planned primarily for the benefit of Jews while allowing non-Jews to attend. If there are indeed Jews at your event (and it sounds like there probably are) then it is certainly a mitzvah for you to organize a Friday night kiddush for and with them. So go for it!

But if you find that there are no Jews, don't forget that it is fine to do your own Shabbat rituals for yourself without making it a display for others. I have done that before when on scout troop camping trips for example. It just makes me feel uncomfortable to think about Jewish ritual done in the absence of Jews. It reminds me of the weird situation of towns in Eastern Europe which no longer have Jews (after killing them off!) but which have Klezmer revival festivals.

If my friends lived closer I'd invite them over on Friday nights just to have a little comapny. I don't think that I'd go through the whole ritual though because it would make me feel like "entertainent". I could light candles and say blessings before they arrived.